New Years

It has been months. It is now 2010. I am now in college. I have experienced first semester of my freshman year in college, and I leave home for break with nothing but some knowledge in my purse and angst about the semester to come. I feel like I am in a pre-college program, rather than actual college. Do I want to transfer majors or even schools? What do I want to do with my BFA in art? And don't I want to pursue fashion? And what about Jordan? What do I do about him?

My life is in shambles, but I really enjoy college. Even with all of these nonsensical complaints, I love college. I cannot believe we all survived Catalina, and have made this transition into the next step of our lives. What is to come next? All I know is that I feel that I have reinvented myself in New York, with its concrete jungles and dashing galleries. It really is still hard, however, to come to such a big place with so many people. People say "girl, you know everyone", and I may know a lot of people, but inside, I am just as lonely as anyone could ever imagine. Just because you know people, doesn't mean you have the definite friendship aspect to the relationship.

Now I am home, to parents who nag but claim it is to "better" me, to "better" my character. I miss the city, I miss the people I have left behind, and I miss the new adventures to come in the near future. The city, is, my home.